Disclosure of Vision Loss AKA niseme miyi ni Mpofu?

Disclosure of Vision Loss Do we disclose our blindness immediately in the online social media activities? If we do, will that scare people off before they even get to know us? Should we be honest and upfront? Will most people appreciate our forthcomingness? It depends case by case. Interesting times ahead I can reveal. My confidence never fails me. Although some times I have dared instances! Sometimes not every one would believe that am Blind because I respond to facebook either too first when typing or many don’t expect Blind fellow like me to just be “normal” you know the stereotype of the society where expectations are placed lowly for a blind person. This is no wonder many employers in Kenya don’t want us on board. Some adverts still discriminate us they even go ahead and tell organizations for persons with disabilities “we don’t want visually impaired persons” Anyway lets go back To some social media escapades where some friends I didn’t reveal immediately that I’m blind, To me it was not an obligation since I perceived its just normal. What I din’t know what is normal to me to the society its abnormal. When I din;t click with someone I would further terminate my case even before the jury but if there seemed to be interest between the other person and me, I did let him know before we actually met. Have met many individuals through the facebook, with whom I have built friendship that lasted just over many years. Many who din;t believe after meeting them they later tell me he/she was glad I told them in advance, as it might have been a bit of a shocking surprise had they not known beforehand. Of course, then there were those who greeted the news with immediate rejection I remember a instance I was to meet someone in a hotel somewhere and later the phone was off and in the thin aire no trace could be seen. Back to the facebook some could ultimately reject me with with statements like, "I’ve never met a blind person. I wouldn’t know how to act!" I quickly learned that most people who made such proclamations also chose to remain ignorant and not venture out of their comfort zone. I would soon learn, this wasn’t a question with a simple, easy answer, that it’s different for everyone. I had to make a choice I could live with. So, I included that bit of information about me. I didn’t make it the first thing someone read when they came across my profile, but I didn’t act like it was a secret. I tried to be middle-of-the-road in this like I try to be in most things in life. That’s why over the years on facebook have tried to sell the brand Blind the boss, Mpofu namba 1. This would chase away those who are ignorant so that I could not deal with fake social ticsk. There. Decision made. That was done. I could write a profile, but how long to make it? The questions kept on coming. Soon though, so did the messages. Many a times, people couldn’t believe am Blind. Some were insulting and awful, but it felt comforting I was getting reactions I heard every other blind individuals also received because I felt like I was just like everyone else. I liked being online because I could block and delete. I didn’t have to answer every message, not if it was rude or thoughtless. I felt like I had some kind of control, the kind I had none of in a noisy, busy, blurry bar. It was still a visual concept, the fact that communicating and felt like a buffet of sorts, which are also difficult for people who are blind. Many people in this zugabaga streets expect us to be of low intellect and non performance of duties which are expected of me. Some couldn’t believe I have gone to school etc. I found that everyone has preferences and qualities they are looking for. I wasn’t exempt from doing this; for some, it was physical attributes, for me it was a lack of grammar. I soon found my comfort with the right amount of messages, back and forth, before meeting in person. Some seemed in a hurry, while I liked to learn a bit about them, but not so much that there would be little magic in a first face-to-face meeting. As the social media fraternity grew I opted to also use phone. While most people liked pictures, to see what they’d be getting, I liked to hear a voice over the phone. It gave me something to go by, and I could tell I couldn’t fault some guy if my face wasn’t what they were looking for. Sure, we could meet, and he/she could change his mind after hearing my stories or my dry, witty sense of humor. But so could I meet him and fall for him/her, even if my initial attraction to the sound of his/her voice hadn’t been immediate. It was all a game of chance. My blindness is just one bit of the puzzle, one thing a person can choose to accept or not accept, just as I must if a person who likes camping, when I hate it, is the right person for me to take a chance on. for sure kuna story which captures the imagination. Of course, some differences are bigger than others, and I still know, after being in a few relationships with people I first met online, that this world is not my home is a very complicated and multi-layered. The Keyword: "Game"For now, I am focusing on myself and making the best life I possibly can. I can’t allow myself to get too hung up on the pictures I can’t see or the things I cannot control. Loving myself and my life is the part I can.